I look back at the content that I wrote in the past, and in reflection all of it was pretty terrible. The content is garbage, but then that's okay. What concerns me is the style, editing and formatting....
Sorry. All the stuff written previous to this sucked.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
50 Shades of Quek
Hello all, this is how I am spending my Saturday night this week. It has almost been a whole year since I last posted on this, so I hope that you have missed me and you are dying for the next instalment of my unparalleled quality reading material. Actually what I really do hope is that you are doing something a little more exciting on a Saturday, and NOT reading this garbage.
Speaking of reading stuff, I have been reading 50 Shades of Gray for the past few weeks. Why a few weeks you ask? Because I only read it on the train to work, which is about 15 minutes a day. This time frame that I have allowed gives you a hint of what I think about the book; it's not very engaging, nor captivating, however for some reason I am still compelled to try and finish the book.
Ok so how does this help you? It doesn't, I've decided to just write a review on it so read on if you want. If you don't, things may get better so stick with me for at least the rest of this paragraph. Or the next.
In my very modest and amateur opinion, this book has been edited to an acceptable level..........and that is probably the best thing I could say about the book. E.L James is repetitive when she is required to get visual in her articulations, however the way she has evolved the characters feels natural and believable. I don't know if that is an easy thing to accomplish, seeing that NOTHING truly compelling actually ever happens. In comparison, stuff actually happens in Twilight. Not much, but at least there was some. My unsure nature comes from the fact that I have never read one of these kind of relationship books and, if they all have a similar feel regardless if there is BDSM or not, it will probably be my last. (Just trying to recover some heterosexuality there if you don't mind)
I'm not going to turn into another hater - there are tons of those already. The fact of the matter is that I have now read 80% of the book and plan to finish it. Therefore there must be something that keeps me going. I have concluded that it is the dynamics of the characters that has kept me going - the psyche of both Christian and Anastasia. It was good for the first 40% of the book and after that it has been getting a little stale, as per my previous comment made on James's repetitiveness.
Would I recommend this book? Perhaps. Probably not. Actually just outright no, based on the fact that there are a lot of better reads out there. If the BDSM part is scaring you off - don't worry it is established early on that that aspect is kept pretty light. Unless it is going to get hardcore in the last 20%. There are no real opportune times to read this book either. Reading it on the train gets awkward when Miss Steele and Mr Grey get frisky. One, you become a little self concious reading the content with all these randoms around you, two you become even more self concious when you are standing up to disembark the train , and three it doesn't really help you focus in on the right mindset to start work. If the purpose of bedtime reading is to help you fall asleep, Fifty Shades does not help there either. In a way it's a little annoying; at first you just wanted to fall asleep but now you have read for five minutes and now you don't feel like sleeping...........
I personally wanted to see what the hype was about, and so far I have had no regrets reading the book over the past few weeks. Coming from investing all the time taken to read the Twilight Trilogy, I have been calloused against the feeling of disappointment. No homo yolo.
Speaking of reading stuff, I have been reading 50 Shades of Gray for the past few weeks. Why a few weeks you ask? Because I only read it on the train to work, which is about 15 minutes a day. This time frame that I have allowed gives you a hint of what I think about the book; it's not very engaging, nor captivating, however for some reason I am still compelled to try and finish the book.
Ok so how does this help you? It doesn't, I've decided to just write a review on it so read on if you want. If you don't, things may get better so stick with me for at least the rest of this paragraph. Or the next.
In my very modest and amateur opinion, this book has been edited to an acceptable level..........and that is probably the best thing I could say about the book. E.L James is repetitive when she is required to get visual in her articulations, however the way she has evolved the characters feels natural and believable. I don't know if that is an easy thing to accomplish, seeing that NOTHING truly compelling actually ever happens. In comparison, stuff actually happens in Twilight. Not much, but at least there was some. My unsure nature comes from the fact that I have never read one of these kind of relationship books and, if they all have a similar feel regardless if there is BDSM or not, it will probably be my last. (Just trying to recover some heterosexuality there if you don't mind)
I'm not going to turn into another hater - there are tons of those already. The fact of the matter is that I have now read 80% of the book and plan to finish it. Therefore there must be something that keeps me going. I have concluded that it is the dynamics of the characters that has kept me going - the psyche of both Christian and Anastasia. It was good for the first 40% of the book and after that it has been getting a little stale, as per my previous comment made on James's repetitiveness.
Would I recommend this book? Perhaps. Probably not. Actually just outright no, based on the fact that there are a lot of better reads out there. If the BDSM part is scaring you off - don't worry it is established early on that that aspect is kept pretty light. Unless it is going to get hardcore in the last 20%. There are no real opportune times to read this book either. Reading it on the train gets awkward when Miss Steele and Mr Grey get frisky. One, you become a little self concious reading the content with all these randoms around you, two you become even more self concious when you are standing up to disembark the train , and three it doesn't really help you focus in on the right mindset to start work. If the purpose of bedtime reading is to help you fall asleep, Fifty Shades does not help there either. In a way it's a little annoying; at first you just wanted to fall asleep but now you have read for five minutes and now you don't feel like sleeping...........
I personally wanted to see what the hype was about, and so far I have had no regrets reading the book over the past few weeks. Coming from investing all the time taken to read the Twilight Trilogy, I have been calloused against the feeling of disappointment. No homo yolo.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
How Buff is Buff?
So you ask, how buff is buff?
Buff is an attitude
Buff is a state of mind
Buff is a place that you want to be
Buff is squatting until you cannot squat no more
Buff is deadlifting weights that bend the bar
Buff is benching until your spotter's sweat drips on to your face
Buff is black powder whispering in your ear that you will lift heavy ass weights
Buff is executing every lift with pure focus and form
Buff is the 3 x 8, the 5 x 5, the 5 -3 - 1.
Buff is feeling the pump, getting swole.
Buff is your Gold Standard, repairing you for more buff to come
Buff is hypertrophy
Buff is strength
Buff is power
Buff is supersets
Buff is the one rep max
Buff is Cross Fit
Buff is one more rep
Buff is two more reps after the one more rep
Buff is beast
So how buff is buff?
That is an easy question to answer:
Buff is buff.
I feel very embarrassed right now, in hind sight this is a pretty shizer poem that doesn't leave me feeling very hetero. I did want to try my hand at poetry, and I got to say I don't know how poets get any confidence in what they write - surely they feel like absolute douches. All modern day poets must be sexually confused hipsters or something. I am going to delete this after Anthony reads this so if you get to read this consider yourself lucky.
Buff is an attitude
Buff is a state of mind
Buff is a place that you want to be
Buff is squatting until you cannot squat no more
Buff is deadlifting weights that bend the bar
Buff is benching until your spotter's sweat drips on to your face
Buff is black powder whispering in your ear that you will lift heavy ass weights
Buff is executing every lift with pure focus and form
Buff is the 3 x 8, the 5 x 5, the 5 -3 - 1.
Buff is feeling the pump, getting swole.
Buff is your Gold Standard, repairing you for more buff to come
Buff is hypertrophy
Buff is strength
Buff is power
Buff is supersets
Buff is the one rep max
Buff is Cross Fit
Buff is one more rep
Buff is two more reps after the one more rep
Buff is beast
So how buff is buff?
That is an easy question to answer:
Buff is buff.
I feel very embarrassed right now, in hind sight this is a pretty shizer poem that doesn't leave me feeling very hetero. I did want to try my hand at poetry, and I got to say I don't know how poets get any confidence in what they write - surely they feel like absolute douches. All modern day poets must be sexually confused hipsters or something. I am going to delete this after Anthony reads this so if you get to read this consider yourself lucky.
Happy Birthday..........Mother Fucker
Ok back on the gravy train beeetchez. It has almost been a whole year since I have posted in this blog. Probably because I found something better to do with my time and I was filling it with productive, self improving activities. Like watching Sparatcus - A show I highly recommend to all hetero men.
I am currently at Anthony's house, with Anthony at his house, and it his birthday today! He has convinced me to write something today seeing that he is 'special' for the next 24 hours. I even had to do a password reset on this bad boy. The amount of effort that I have already put in up to this point has been excessive, and I have not even written anything that is of any use. Sorry for wasting your time, but stick around matey, good shit will roll down soon I assure you.
Tomorrow we are going to have a day of Cross Fit - esque activities in honour of our cross fitting birthday boy. This idea excites me, yet scares the shit out of me at the same time. Why you ask? Because some genius mind thinks doing 10 100kg deadlifts As Many Rounds As Possible is a really cool idea, after doing two strenuous exercises prior.
That's the problem with these Cross Fitters. They are hell fit? Chris Barnes knows what I am talking about. They think they are hell cool with their so called 'kipping' and 'butterflying' and 'muscle upping'. Please, kipping is the same motion as you develop when you are a kid and your mummy or daddy can't be bothered pushing you on the swing anymore, and butterflying is a move best taught, not at an XFit gym but, by Cathy at Metros.
Ok before I get rained on by too much hate I should state that I am a Cross Fit fan. I have just been too much of a cheap ass to join their ranks. I'm no hater, just a poor C.
I am currently at Anthony's house, with Anthony at his house, and it his birthday today! He has convinced me to write something today seeing that he is 'special' for the next 24 hours. I even had to do a password reset on this bad boy. The amount of effort that I have already put in up to this point has been excessive, and I have not even written anything that is of any use. Sorry for wasting your time, but stick around matey, good shit will roll down soon I assure you.
Tomorrow we are going to have a day of Cross Fit - esque activities in honour of our cross fitting birthday boy. This idea excites me, yet scares the shit out of me at the same time. Why you ask? Because some genius mind thinks doing 10 100kg deadlifts As Many Rounds As Possible is a really cool idea, after doing two strenuous exercises prior.
That's the problem with these Cross Fitters. They are hell fit? Chris Barnes knows what I am talking about. They think they are hell cool with their so called 'kipping' and 'butterflying' and 'muscle upping'. Please, kipping is the same motion as you develop when you are a kid and your mummy or daddy can't be bothered pushing you on the swing anymore, and butterflying is a move best taught, not at an XFit gym but, by Cathy at Metros.
Ok before I get rained on by too much hate I should state that I am a Cross Fit fan. I have just been too much of a cheap ass to join their ranks. I'm no hater, just a poor C.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego?
That bitch was hot. I was digging her back in the day. For some reason I found her red coat so alluring.
How could she miss?
I am cursed with the recurrence of warts on my right hand, specifically on my digits. It's not very nice to look at, I feel sorry for people when I shake their hand, and it definitely does not pick up chicks. I've tried, doesn't work. Warts aren't hot.
I go to the doctor who I assume, after 6, 7 years of uni and an extra 20 years of experience, would have the skill set to burn off my wart. I was gravely mistaken. She missed...........how does she dab a cotton tip of liquid nitrogen left of my wart, and blister my hand for no good reason?
It shits me to tears that I did not say anything. I knew she missed....actually I did say something. I said 'You haven't burnt my wart'. She replied 'Yes I did, it's just warmed up again so it doesn't look burnt'. She was semi telling the truth. She fondled my wart with the liquid nitrogen, but then decided it would probably help me get rid of it better if she plunged it in to a healthy spot of skin just right of it instead.
It's a pity that I like this doctor. She's really cool....just not co-ordinated. I'll go and see her again for the second burn that never should have been needed.
THAT'S ANOTHER THING
I usually let the wart grow until it's huge and I cannot hold a normal conversation with people outside my inside social circle as I always catch them darting their eyes to my basically mutated right hand. Before you know it the conversation is based around my wart and how disgusting it looked and it always ended with 'You should get that burnt off sometime'. No shit mate. This time I got the burn in early so it would not look hideous and I would only have to get it burned once. So the moral of this story: A stitch in time does not save nine. A stitch in time is just practice for the other nine stitches that you'll probably have to get later.
Cool story bro. Yeah I know. Your fault for getting this far. If you have gotten this far you probably have enough free time to start playing starcraft 2. I've got to go pee.
Cool story bro!
I go to the doctor who I assume, after 6, 7 years of uni and an extra 20 years of experience, would have the skill set to burn off my wart. I was gravely mistaken. She missed...........how does she dab a cotton tip of liquid nitrogen left of my wart, and blister my hand for no good reason?
It shits me to tears that I did not say anything. I knew she missed....actually I did say something. I said 'You haven't burnt my wart'. She replied 'Yes I did, it's just warmed up again so it doesn't look burnt'. She was semi telling the truth. She fondled my wart with the liquid nitrogen, but then decided it would probably help me get rid of it better if she plunged it in to a healthy spot of skin just right of it instead.
It's a pity that I like this doctor. She's really cool....just not co-ordinated. I'll go and see her again for the second burn that never should have been needed.
THAT'S ANOTHER THING
I usually let the wart grow until it's huge and I cannot hold a normal conversation with people outside my inside social circle as I always catch them darting their eyes to my basically mutated right hand. Before you know it the conversation is based around my wart and how disgusting it looked and it always ended with 'You should get that burnt off sometime'. No shit mate. This time I got the burn in early so it would not look hideous and I would only have to get it burned once. So the moral of this story: A stitch in time does not save nine. A stitch in time is just practice for the other nine stitches that you'll probably have to get later.
Cool story bro. Yeah I know. Your fault for getting this far. If you have gotten this far you probably have enough free time to start playing starcraft 2. I've got to go pee.
Cool story bro!
Fucking Hipsters and their Fixies
Since I am now aware that people read this I may as well write it in a style that is more 'reader friendly'....maybe...I don't know I don't care you should really go do something more productive.
So I wake up this morning and start the usual shit talk with Ant. The majority of our conversations somehow find their way to hipster talk, and this one was no exception. I forgot who thought of it first, but we came to the idea that fixies, despite being fucking hipster, may actually be cool.
If hipsters use it, it must be cool right? I'm sorry but if you are thinking this you are probably a hipster or a hipster in the making, and you are living in your hipster delusion fantasy world where interior semiotics replays in your head over and over and over again. Maybe hipsters are cool? I'm not sure? Maybe you have to be a hipster to truly find out.....or maybe it's just best to play things safe.
Anyways so Ant is now giving me ideas.......a fixie may be the cool factor I need to boost my coolness past the point I set myself as a new years resolution. NO I HAVE NOT HIT THAT POINT YET BUT SHHHH BE QUIET. So we start contemplating, how much do fixies cost? It's a POS frame with one gear and no free wheeling ability, surely it will cost $100 or so right? Absolutely wrong. $400 for the cheapest fixie. I didn't believe the prices I saw online so I called up a shop for confirmation.
Ben Ngooi wtf were you thinking mate?
Out of curiousity I ask the store guy why people would purchase a fixie. Besides the simplicity, every reason he gave me seemed ridiculous, as if he was a delusional hipster himself. He wasn't he was just a salesman trying to do his job, but the fact of the matter is he was spitting shit.
So why are fixies so expensive if they are POS? BECAUSE OF HIPSTER DEMAND. At $400, surely there is excess demand coming from hipsters, and therefore the hipster population is growing. At $400, no wonder hipsters grow facial hair, it's because they spend all their hard earned money from the dole / working at a dodgy record store / working as a cameraman for interior semiotics 2, on a fixie and do not have enough money for a shaver! It's elementary my dear Watson! Anyways, if the hipster population grows to the point where they can no more be classified as a minority, are they still considered hipsters?
Ok so I think screw all this I am going to make my own fixie. I have an old mountain bike ready to be hipped up. Ant agrees that if this is done, all hipsters shall bow down to my superior hipness. This sounds very attractive - Duane Quek: King of the hipsters. I like the ring. Maybe the hipster way of life is for me? I google this idea, thinking it'll be easy. I was gravely mistaken. It seems like making something so damn simple is not simple at all. The complexity of converting an old bike into a fixie must be complicated by hipsters who just need everything to be 'artsy'.
Do I have something against hipsters? No.....I am just a confused normal individual who is perplexed about the culture. I feel like I cannot ever join your ranks as my ability to grow facial hair is just embarrassing, and I don't own one of those cool polaroid cameras. If anyone is reading this and they own a fixie, I just want you to know that I am uber jealous and I want a ride. Ben, can you ride back from Melbourne so I can have a go? Cheers bra.
Unfortunately there are no hipsters in the MCL right now....
If you are unsure of what a hipster is, please google 'look at this fucking hipster' or 'interior semiotics' and you will get the gist...or not...it's probably better if you just live in your non hipster world ignorance, as knowledge of hipster culture may make you want to pour spaghetti all over yourself and more some in the name of art.
So I wake up this morning and start the usual shit talk with Ant. The majority of our conversations somehow find their way to hipster talk, and this one was no exception. I forgot who thought of it first, but we came to the idea that fixies, despite being fucking hipster, may actually be cool.
If hipsters use it, it must be cool right? I'm sorry but if you are thinking this you are probably a hipster or a hipster in the making, and you are living in your hipster delusion fantasy world where interior semiotics replays in your head over and over and over again. Maybe hipsters are cool? I'm not sure? Maybe you have to be a hipster to truly find out.....or maybe it's just best to play things safe.
Anyways so Ant is now giving me ideas.......a fixie may be the cool factor I need to boost my coolness past the point I set myself as a new years resolution. NO I HAVE NOT HIT THAT POINT YET BUT SHHHH BE QUIET. So we start contemplating, how much do fixies cost? It's a POS frame with one gear and no free wheeling ability, surely it will cost $100 or so right? Absolutely wrong. $400 for the cheapest fixie. I didn't believe the prices I saw online so I called up a shop for confirmation.
Ben Ngooi wtf were you thinking mate?
Out of curiousity I ask the store guy why people would purchase a fixie. Besides the simplicity, every reason he gave me seemed ridiculous, as if he was a delusional hipster himself. He wasn't he was just a salesman trying to do his job, but the fact of the matter is he was spitting shit.
So why are fixies so expensive if they are POS? BECAUSE OF HIPSTER DEMAND. At $400, surely there is excess demand coming from hipsters, and therefore the hipster population is growing. At $400, no wonder hipsters grow facial hair, it's because they spend all their hard earned money from the dole / working at a dodgy record store / working as a cameraman for interior semiotics 2, on a fixie and do not have enough money for a shaver! It's elementary my dear Watson! Anyways, if the hipster population grows to the point where they can no more be classified as a minority, are they still considered hipsters?
Ok so I think screw all this I am going to make my own fixie. I have an old mountain bike ready to be hipped up. Ant agrees that if this is done, all hipsters shall bow down to my superior hipness. This sounds very attractive - Duane Quek: King of the hipsters. I like the ring. Maybe the hipster way of life is for me? I google this idea, thinking it'll be easy. I was gravely mistaken. It seems like making something so damn simple is not simple at all. The complexity of converting an old bike into a fixie must be complicated by hipsters who just need everything to be 'artsy'.
Do I have something against hipsters? No.....I am just a confused normal individual who is perplexed about the culture. I feel like I cannot ever join your ranks as my ability to grow facial hair is just embarrassing, and I don't own one of those cool polaroid cameras. If anyone is reading this and they own a fixie, I just want you to know that I am uber jealous and I want a ride. Ben, can you ride back from Melbourne so I can have a go? Cheers bra.
Unfortunately there are no hipsters in the MCL right now....
If you are unsure of what a hipster is, please google 'look at this fucking hipster' or 'interior semiotics' and you will get the gist...or not...it's probably better if you just live in your non hipster world ignorance, as knowledge of hipster culture may make you want to pour spaghetti all over yourself and more some in the name of art.
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